alieniloquy

long strings, salmon, and JT

well, the photos I took last night came out amazing. I'm still working through editing them, but I am excited. Its been really good for me to photograph these events (Anyfolk), simply for the sake of exposure therapy. I've been so in my head, in my own world, for the past few years, that I've developed a lot of anxiety around just going out and doing things like this on my own. I'm glad that I've been able to hold myself accountable and keep this up, and its getting easier (though the beginnings of the events are always tough). I always have this feeling that I just don't fit in when I first get there, and then as things begin, I start photographing, and then begin talking to people during intermission and afterwards, I suddenly realize that everything is okay (haha). I'm not the only one who feels like this, and everyone is here because they want the same thing as I do. Socializing and community.

I'm excited to be able to see Ellen Fullman perform tomorrow night at the museum, with JACK quartet. I remember stumbling across her long stringed instrument, essentially exactly what it sounds like, online years ago, and just being mesmerized. I then stored it away in some part sub- part of my brain, and was only reminded of it today as I was walking across the atrium to get a coffee and literally saw her setting up the instrument in the middle of the room. I stood there and watched her tuning it, and playing it a little. I felt a heavy, emotional response to the music and had to fight to stay grounded while still at work.

I'm going to bring my camera with me tomorrow night, after work, and take some photos of the performance to remember it by. I shared her work with some friends and D- had said he can't make the performance, but that he deeply wanted to get into making experimental music, after hearing her work just then and seeing some recent shows at his space, Greenhouse Gallery. We plan on collaborating in the near future, and I'm excited to see what happens.

After work I came home, smoked a little bit, and relaxed. I did the dishes that were piling up, cleaned up a little, and decided to walk to the grocery store. I was going to make one big trip tomorrow, but decided to go today too, just to make sure I have at least something before the big winter storm this weekend. I'm so lucky that there's an Aldi within a 10 minute walk, because driving in the city really stresses me out, not that its difficult, just that I really don't like getting caught in traffic. I love being the pedestrian I usually see when I'm in my car, stuck in traffic, beating me to my destination.

I picked up some salmon, peppers, zucchini, and cherry tomatoes, and made a simple sauce by cooking all those down to eat over ravioli, while the salmon was in the oven. When it was done, I neglected to turn on the tv to get engrossed in a show, and instead just ate at the table. Quite nice, actually. Just listening to music, eating, and then continuing what I wanted to finish (getting the photos off of my card onto my computer and ready to edit). I'll spend time this weekend on those.

I listened to a lot of my dad's old records, because sometimes you just have to listen to classic stuff. Some of what I listened to tonight were:

I think what I love about listening to older stuff is just remembering hearing all of this music when I was a kid, before I was worrying about my place in the world and who I want to be, etc. I can visit those simpler times just by listening to these albums, and get more out of it with each listen.

Well, I'm going to wind down and read for a bit now. Some things I want to write about more are some albums I've been listening to lately (more in depth explications). I was going to get into it tonight, but I'm tired.