The Importance of Small Rituals
I didn't sleep that well last night, but eventually fell into a slumber that felt renewing in the early hours of pre-dawn. I was kept awake (and has been the case for the better part of the past few months) with thoughts regarding my general purpose in life, this world, everything. I love being here in Richmond, and have made some really wonderful friendships, gained a lot of professional experience, but I still don't feel at home here. I'm constantly feeling homesick for New England (as I've written vented about here many times).
When I feel like that, homesick and lonely, and aimless, I try to remember small rituals. These small rituals remind me who I am. Things like sitting in my favorite chair, positioned away from all electronics, on a weekend morning, reading escapist fiction (currently the Outlander series, much different than the TV series too, read them!) and drinking my morning coffee. Typing on my typewriter, record shopping, getting a nice haircut at a barber who gives you a beer and chats with you the whole time. These are all things I love that I can easily forget to keep up with, instead entering into a seemingly endless spiral of anxiety.
Its so easy to fall out of these small rituals. Its easy to get sucked into the mundane ritual of going to work, coming home from work, and doing this over and over, while the turntable collects dust, my bookmark stays on the same page, and my morning coffee makes it to a travel mug before the favorite ceramic Cafe Du Monde mug I've been using for decades.
I'm looking forward to the rain we're supposed to have tomorrow too. We've been in a dreadful heatwave the past week and it saps all the energy out of me. It'll be nice once things cool down.
This post is a reminder to myself to stay true to all the small rituals that keep me feeling me, and when I'm not feeling good, make a list of all the things I haven't done. If I'm feeling anxious, or depressed, and I find that I haven't listened to music, or played guitar, or read for hours, then I know why I'm feeling bad.